How to Know if Therapy is Working: Setting Goals and Evaluating Progress

Starting to question old beliefs that no longer serve you

Starting therapy is a big step, and it’s completely normal to wonder how you’ll know if it’s actually helping. "Why am I still dealing with the same old stuff?" or "Is this what therapy is even supposed to feel like?" Therapy isn’t always a linear path, and it doesn’t always come with with clear milestones. But there are ways to get a sense of whether things are shifting in a helpful direction. In this post, we’ll explore how to evaluate progress in therapy, why setting goals can help, and what to do if things feel unclear or stuck.

Your Inner Compass: How Do I Even Know If Therapy Is Working?

It’s a fair question—especially after a few sessions, when the newness has worn off and you’re deep in the middle of it all. You might not feel radically different yet, and that can be make it hard to tell if anything’s changing. There’s no one-size fits all answer here, but there are some common signs that therapy is having an impact. 

Progress might look like:

• Feeling a little less stuck in the same thought loops

• Becoming more aware of your needs, emotions, or boundaries

• Having a hard conversation you would’ve avoided before

• Feeling more able to tolerate discomfort or uncertainty

• Starting to question old beliefs that no longer serve you

It might not feel like a “breakthrough”—but it’s often these small, layered shifts that point to meaningful change.

The Importance of Setting Goals with Your Therapist Up Front

Some people come into therapy with a very specific goal in mind. Others aren’t totally sure yet—they just know something feels off. Either way is okay. But working with your therapist to set goals can help you stay motivated and feel in control. They don't need to be lofty or extremely detailed at first and can evolve over time as your needs or insights change. Don't be shy about asking your therapist for help in setting goals that really matter to you. Working together on this can have a significant impact on the efficacy of your treatment.

Why are goals important in therapy?

• Clarity and direction: Setting goals gives therapy a structure. Instead of sessions feeling like open-ended conversations, they become purposeful and targeted.

• Motivation and engagement: Having something to work toward can keep you engaged in the process, especially when progress feels slow.
  Tracking progress: With specific goals in place, you’ll have benchmarks to reflect on. Are you closer to managing your anxiety? Have your depressive episodes become less intense or less frequent?

 Navigating the Ups and Downs of Therapy

Therapy isn’t always a steady climb upward. There will be sessions that feel like breakthroughs—and others that feel like... not so great. This doesn’t necessarily mean it’s not working. Let’s walk through a few common questions that may come up along the way: 

"Am I Actually Getting Better?"

This is a big one—and very common.

When you feel like you're not moving forward as quickly as you had hoped, it’s easy to get discouraged and wonder if it’s working. Remember, sometimes growth feels less like a lightbulb moment and more like a quiet shift you may not even notice right away. 

If you're wondering if you are improving, take a moment to think back to why you started in the first place. Are those issues feeling less intense? Are you learning new ways to handle things? Do you feel more competent in general? It's also super helpful to just ask your therapist what they think about your progress. They have a professional perspective and can point out changes you might not even be noticing.

"Why Am I Still Struggling with the Same Things?"

It’s frustrating—and valid to feel that way. But healing isn’t always about wiping something out completely. Sometimes it’s about relating to it differently.

You might still get anxious. You might still feel the urge to shut down or please everyone. But maybe now, you catch it sooner. Maybe you name it. Maybe you choose differently—even just once. That’s meaningful.

Visible vs. Invisible Progress

Progress in therapy can manifest in various ways:

• External Changes: Better communication, healthier boundaries, fewer panic attacks, more energy.

• Internal shifts: self-awareness, increased self-compassion, less shame, and better emotional regulation.

• Skill development: New coping mechanisms, tools for navigating conflicts, boundary-setting abilities

But if you feel like you’re stuck in a loop, say so. Your therapist is there to explore that with you—not to judge your pace or “fix” it.

"Is This What Therapy Is Supposed to Feel Like?"

There’s no single “right” way to feel, especially in the early stages:

• Discomfort: Growth frequently requires confronting difficult emotions or memories. A certain level of discomfort can be productive, but it shouldn’t feel unsafe or retraumatizing.

• Connection: Most effective therapeutic relationships involve feeling understood and supported, even when challenged.

• Fluctuating emotions: It's normal to leave some sessions feeling relieved and others feeling emotionally raw.

• Reflection, not advice: Your therapist may ask questions that stick with you or help you see something differently—not because they have the answers, but because they’re helping you find them. And if something feels off, say something. A good therapist will welcome that feedback.

Wrapping Up: Your Therapy Journey Is Yours

There’s no gold star or finish line in therapy. But there are signs that things are shifting—both in how you feel and how you show up in the world. 

The key indicators of whether therapy is effective include setting clear goals, tracking your experience, and staying in open communication with your therapist. Therapy works best when it’s collaborative, honest, and flexible. 

Just remember that therapy has its ups and downs, and it's okay to have questions and face some bumps along the way. By being an active part of your treatment, being honest about what you're experiencing, and keeping that communication line open with your therapist, you're setting yourself up for a more rewarding and successful journey towards feeling your best. You've got this!

Other Services Offered with Highland Park Therapy

At Highland Park Holistic Therapy, we provide a wide range of mental health services, including depression therapy, anxiety treatment, grief counseling, trauma therapy, and other services, including online therapy, in our Los Angeles, CA office. You can also read more by visiting our blog, FAQ page, or our groups page.